My yet to be named book club met last night to discuss our current book “The Five Love Languages”. As with our other meetings we started the night out discussing the book, but by the end of the night we were discussing very detailed accounts of child birth…that was not in the book. Along the way we talked about marriage and there were some very surprising and honest things shared. One member did not love her husband when she got married, another was just ready to be married so the who was not so important, another married her childhood sweetheart, and the rest of us singles just listened…very closely I might add.

Which brings me to today…should you be in love with your mate when you get married? I’m actually not so sure that being “in love” is a necessary prerequisite to marriage. While I’ll admit that it would be nice, but given that many marriages end in divorce, does it really matter? I’ve got to believe a lot of those folks thought they were in love on their wedding day, yet “til death do we part” turned out to mean “til sometime before death we parted”. In many cultures marriages are pre-arranged at child birth, are these people in love when they wed? Probably not.

Is it more important that you find a mate with whom you share common life goals and aspirations…someone with whom you enjoy spending time, even though you’re not madly in love? But that begs the question, what makes you fall “in love” with someone?

Can the in love come after the I do?

>> Don’t be shy..what do you think?